Early Visit

Dear AF

I expected you to come and visit only next week. You should at least give me some warning if you decide to come early. Do you like tormenting me?

Feng shui

I read this article on fertility and feng shui, i don't know if it can work, but i am so desperate and will try anything.

Has anybody tried feng shui? And has it worked for you?

Feeling Sick

I have been feeling sick for the last couple of days, and i went to go see a doctor yesterday, she told me that i have bronchitis and gave me antibiotics and some other pills to drink. When i was in the consultation room with her, she asked me if i could be pregnant (she wanted to know before she put me on the antibiotics) I told her that "maybe" we have been trying for the last year. She did a pregnancy test and it came back negative (No suprise) So M and i will just have to keep trying again.

In other news, We had one of M's colleagues over for dinner, he brought his 7 month pregnant wife with him, i couldn't help starring at her belly the whole time, i thought to my self if i didn't have the miscarriage i would have been almost 7 months pregnant right now, i would also have a belly like that. I think what made me mad the most is that she still drinks wine and smokes!!!!
How the hell do you drink and smoke while 7 months pregnant don't you know what you are doing to that unborn child. Even when i am in the two week wait i won't dare touch a alcoholic drink. I know i want to give my future child a healthy start in life, how can she do that to a innocent baby, some people (in my opinion) shouldn't get the privilage of being parents.

Great dad

Yesterday we had M's mother and sister (with her 20 month old son) over for dinner. He is so cute, he can almost say the ABC's all on his own. M is really great with him, I know that he will be a great dad, I just wish that i can give him the opportunity to be one, and that i can be a mom.

I am ovulating, so we will have to do the baby dans tonight, and just hope for the best.

My Babies

Take a look at my new puppies!!!











They are 6 and 7 weeks old.

I need to be a mother, i need to care for someone, and nurture it, and since i am batteling to get pregnant these puppies will just have to deal with me fondling over them.

Nope, Still Trying

Nope not pregnant, i got my hopes up for nothing, I think my body likes tormenting me, making me believe that there just might be a chance then grabbing it out of my hand again. Im making a promise to myself today, i will not get my hopes up before i miss my period.

Counting down

Only 3 days till my period is expected, i haven't peed on a pregnancy test yet, i want to hold out till monday, I really hope I am pregnant